I'm not usually the waffling sort. Bet you guessed that. I like to get all the information I can and then make a decision and plow through. It's a simple way to approach life, and I like it...most days, unless someone throws a monkey wrench in the works.
So, why do I find myself second guessing my choices now? Why do I find it hard, besides the fact that I'm exhausted and tired, to decide which project I should knuckle down on next? Let me lay it out and go from there...
Several friends have sent me the same set of guidelines. On the surface, it seems an ideal line for me. So, why haven't I submitted to them, yet? Well, there's one nit in the guidelines...or two, really. They expect you to write more than one book for them (not a problem) and they only take paranormals that are contemporary settings...no near futuristics or anything like that. Well, that takes most of my series out of the running right there. Even if they start on Earth of present day, they follow bloodlines down through generations, quickly becoming near futuristic, even if they still have a contemporary feel to them. Submitting to them means starting a NEW series and actually keeping it present-day. The insane part is...I'm actually considering it! I must be demented.
Another one? I know that my life of late has me scattered, but I have offers for contracts on five separate books that need nothing but a cleaning edit and submission...and I haven't done it. I've done some new writing, but why can't I get my head in the game of edits this week?
Okay...I COULD blame life. It wouldn't be unfair of me to do it. After all, my husband (no fault of his own) spent 5 days in PA, came home, shipped off to Cardiff, Wales 5 days later...and with only that much warning that he was going to Wales, is coming home after 8 days there...if he doesn't get diverted because of the weather that will sock us tomorrow...and then has to turn around to PA again. We've had the death in the family. I've still been working my day job (teacher), EPIC, writing, editing for others who need it, updating web sites, coughing up a lung, and playing single parent to three kids, two dogs, one big puppy and two cats. So...yeah, life hasn't exactly been a walk in the park.
But, I don't think that's the whole story, and it would be unfair for me to blame it all on the stress level I'm dealing with. To be honest, I think I'm micro-analyzing what I'm doing, and I'm not certain I know why I am. The initial figures seemed straight-forward to me, so why question them now? This really isn't like me.
26 June 2007
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